- Monday - Monday, March 09, 2009 so today is monday and I am back at work. I am a complete mess, chewing gum and drinking water to keep the tears at bay. it's already starting out to be a GREAT morning. already had a little shame thrown at me because I have no pictures of my boobie baby on me...ahhh, gotta love thoughtless comments. I got here at 8am and have no computer, phone, or really anything that makes a desk. I can't say i'm bubbling over with joy and happiness here. I miss my daughter and my home. I don't know what God is trying to do through this but whatever it is it hurts and I feel like i'm breaking in two and there won't be much left of me when it's all said and done. I keep wondering why this punishment...what did I do? what have I not repented for? if my sins are as far as the east is from the west why does my husband not have a job and I am at work ft and only able to see my daughter from 630 - 7am. thanks God. I keep telling my soul to rejoice... no dice. I get a little better - then I lose it.

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